Yearly Archives: 2017

Drowning.

It fills my heart with joy,
When I see my friends,
Succeeding in life.
It fills my heart with pride,
When I see my friends,
Winning in life.
But, it would be a lie,
That I feel joyous, all the time,
For, the truth is, I don’t.
I don’t lie, for I can’t,
I’m not happy, not because,
I see people living their dreams,
But, because, I see, myself,
Still standing, at the same place,
where I stood, a year ago,
and have moved a step, ahead.
And It’s filling my heart with glum,
But all I do is,
try to wipe the sadness away,
By drowning my night,
in a bottle of rum.

-Tired.

-Abhishek Gupta.

Dil ka aalam.

Dil ka aalam kuch aisa hai.
Gham ki sagar me dooba hai.
Cheekh bhi na aane deta labon par.

Zindagi bezubaan si ho gayi hai.
Dil ka aalam kuch aisa hai.
Ragon me lahoo ki jagah
Ab zeher hi baste hai.

Kise karun bayan Haal-e-Dil?
Ajkal toh apne hi hume
saanp bankar daste hai.

Dil ka aalam kuch aisa hai.
Ke kuch aapke jaisa, aur,
Kuch humare jaisa hai.
Dil ka aalam kuch aisa hai.

-Abhishek Gupta.

खुशी।

बस एक छलावा है खुशी।
आज है ये और कल नहीं।
गम ही रहा है एक सच्चा हमसफ़र।
क्युकी एक जगह कभी ना ठहर पाती ये खुशी।
-अभिषेक गुप्ता।

Lost My Zest.

I’ve lost my zest for life.
I do not know, if it’ll ever come back to me.
I do not know, why have I, become like this.
I do not know, what to do next.
Void my life has become, it feels.
Void my heart has become, it feels.
Writing was my only escape.
Only thing, which kept me sane.
I have lost my vision, it feels.
I’m going insane, it feels.
All my efforts, to overcome this,
It’s all going in vain.
I don’t even understand,
Why am I even feeling this pain?
It’s consuming me, day by day, bit by bit.
I want to write, like I used to, once again.
But I don’t know if I ever
will be able to do that.
For it feels, it feels like I’ve lost my wit.

-Somebody, please save me?

-Drowning in thoughts.

-Abhishek Gupta.

Depression.

Depression is not sadness. Stop considering it as one. It fucks you up from inside. If it has taken lives of people like Robin Williams, Chris Cornell and Chester Bennington, then it’s pretty darn real. Stop saying this “If you’re depressed, talk”. YOU SHOULD GO AND TALK TO THEM. If you feel someone is depressed. Go and talk to them. Don’t wait for them to come and talk to you. They might not. Help them.

– Depression kills.

– Abhishek Gupta.

O Captain! My Captain!

O Captain! My Captain! our fearful trip is done;
The ship has weather’d every rack, the prize we sought is won;
The port is near, the bells I hear, the people all exulting,
While follow eyes the steady keel, the vessel grim and daring:
But O heart! heart! heart!O the bleeding drops of red,Where on the deck my Captain lies,Fallen cold and dead.
O Captain! My Captain! rise up and hear the bells;
Rise up—for you the flag is flung—for you the bugle trills;
For you bouquets and ribbon’d wreaths—for you the shores a-crowding;
For you they call, the swaying mass, their eager faces turning;
Here captain! dear father!This arm beneath your head;It is some dream that on the deck,You’ve fallen cold and dead.
My Captain does not answer, his lips are pale and still;
My father does not feel my arm, he has no pulse nor will;
The ship is anchor’d safe and sound, its voyage closed and done;
From fearful trip, the victor ship, comes in with object won;
Exult, O shores, and ring, O bells!But I, with mournful tread,Walk the deck my captain lies,Fallen cold and dead.

-Walt Whitman.

A broken lover.

You should’ve seen your face.

When you smiled, looking at the sunset.
The fact is, you couldn’t, but I did.
I saw you and your gleaming eyes,
Your hair, waving around with the wind,
Your smile, it was so mesmerising.
The sun was setting, but in my heart,
It was actually rising.
Then you turned around, looking at me,
You asked, why was I smiling?
Was it because of the beautiful sunset?
But, I couldn’t answer you that time,
So I just kept smiling, looking at you.
I still, cannot answer,
if you’ll ever ask me this question,
And it’ll always remain burried in my heart,
That I was smiling because,
That one glance of your smile,
Filled my heart with Euphoria,
All I could see, was your smile,
But you were waiting for someone else,
For, not I, but he, was your sunshine,
And all I could’ve done was
To keep my feelings, my pain,
my love for you, to myself,
For, I knew, you could never, ever, be mine.
For I knew, I’d never ever be your sunshine.

– A broken lover.

– Abhishek Gupta.

Guide.

Let that pain
be your guide
for tomorrow.
Today,
you bear it.
Tomorrow,
With pride,
you wear it.
– Stay strong.
– Abhishek Gupta.

Home.

I read somewhere.

“Sometimes home
can be another person.”

Never, ever, make this
mistake of considering
someone as your home.
You’re not supposed to
look for home in humans.

You want to feel homeless,
If they ever leave you?

If not, then stop.

– It’ll break you down.

– Abhishek Gupta.

Anonymity.

This anonymity,
hidden, it cannot be kept, for long.
Duality is what
defines humanity.
That face you have there.
It’s a mask. Inside, there’s someone.
Who you don’t show, to anyone.
To anyone, but yourself.
You hide it, from the world.
For it might lead your happy life,
Towards its swan song.
My friend, this anonymity,
hidden, it cannot be kept, for long.
– Who are you?
– Abhishek Gupta.